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01:25am 04/01/2006
  Its the only way I'll improve, and it breaks my heart. But I'll do it. I'll walk through fire and glass and needles and rocks. And I'll get better.

Please critque the markings that are marked "Exercise". They are done, no matter what the subject matter, to practice my skills and hopefully improve.

THNX		  
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EXERCISE   
01:22am 04/01/2006
 
mood: contemplative
music: K's Choice - Not An Addict
It began two days ago. I can still feel the little electric jolts surging through my body. They come whenever I undertake a new project. That's what writing has become to me, a project. The waters of creativity are too murky to be a comfortable lover. Imagry has always been just beyond my grasp. But I was resolved to jump full body into the icey water.

And then rapids began.

trite.cliche.
I know. I've tried.

boring.flat
I know. I try.

And words unspoken. The worst words of all.
not.good.enough.

THe spectre that's haunted me my entire life. The lady in black that I fear will visit my grave, leaving jeers and laughter instead of fragrant blossoms.

Why does it haunt me so? Why can no other demon, real or imagined, bring me to my knees and leave my blood running cold?

I take liquid courage. Fire burning my throat. Hot smoke in my lungs. Putrid, yet so sweet. So soothing.

why do I go back for more? why time after time to I see my insides strewn about the floor...and ask them for more?

Because it will make me better?
Because it will make me stronger?
Because its all I know?

Sugar coated, ice sharded lies.

I return time after time...because in the end, when I've been stripped of all the illusions, all the pain, all the misconceptions. When my soul is blown open and lay red and raw for all to see...they are who I've always envied. It is what I've always wanted. What my life was about. The dream I chase now, and will chase forever.

In sight, but just beyond my grasp.		  
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Being more descriptive in imagry   
12:00pm 08/09/2005
  1)Expand your field of vision.
Don't be so focused on the sky that you miss the ground. A person's kneecaps might be as defining as his nose. Look up, down, all around for the details that best capture the thing you are describing.

2)Circle your adverbs.
Watch for unnecessary, irrelevant or extraneous adverbs (especially the ones that end in "ly"). Examine your adverbs to make sure you aren't forcing them to do the hard work of observation for you. Instead of telling us that the heroine works "tirelessly," tells us about the callouses on her hands or her heavy walk.

3)Use adjectives in surprising ways. Try to write description that contains verbal surprises. Seemingly unrelated verbal combinations—"frightful goodness," "ferocious necklace," "barnlike body"—can strike exactly the descriptive note you want.

4)Don't use unusual adjectives twice.
Common adjectives like "small," "brown," or "wet" can be repeated in a story without drawing attention to themselves. Less common adjectives, like "lissome" or "sinister," should only be used once per story.		  
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09:26pm 28/06/2005
  I don't understand what you want from me Dai. Just tell me. You're my only true friend. Why are you so angry with me?  
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04:11am 18/06/2005
  People develop all sorts of bad habits. Smoking, drinking biting fingernails, even murder. Kyrie was guilty of all (well...all but the last of the four. A girl's gotta hang on to some of her innocence), but the worst by far...was her tendency to continue humming music and dancing long after the final drinks had been poured. Long after someone had inevitably pulled her from the writhing mass of sweaty, putrid bodies doing something they claimed was akin to a dance. Of course she was at it again, dancing in her best friend's living room, humming an endless string of American 90's dance tunes. The perfect picture of a foreign educated party girl.

Dai was soon coming up beside her, his hair not as neat, his clothes a little wrinkled, his furry orange coat over his arm. He smirked at Kyrie, used to her habitual singing and dancing and went into his bedroom which looked directly into the living room.

"Kyrie, you should sing professionally." He called from his bedroom, tossing his coat on a chair. His hair was actually quite messy he noticed as he walked past his mirror. Fixing it by pulling it into a tight ponytail he started the water to the Western style shower in the huge bathroom adjacent to his room. Then he started to get undressed. By the time he was in just his pants he reappeared at the door to his room which he had not closed.

"You wanna go in first or should I?" He smiled slyly. "Or would you like me to accompany you in the shower?"

A flash of tongue and middle digit all without missing a beat. She was good...when she tried. "I'm not ready to wash it off yet." Apparently she was ready to abandon her dance as she stopped mid-movement and reached into her purse, pulling out and lighting a cigarette in one fluid movement. " It's a good reminder never to let myself become that asinine, that pathetic." Inhale. The poison smoke entered her lungs. Exhale. White smoke filtered into the apartment. "Ever picture yourself like that Dai? One of the bottom feeders?" Even as she asked her perfectly manicured fingers raked and twirled through her hair. Her feet kept tapping out an inaudible tune. Hard to tell if she was serious when she was like this. Then again it was always hard to tell if she was being serious, simply because with every one but Dai she never was.

Dai looked honestly disappointed and shrugged. He stepped out from his room a little to lean on the doorframe. "Of course I've pictured myself as one of them. I have to look at life from every possible aspect to figure out a plan to better myself." Oh Dai, always the businessman. It was a wonder he'd had sex before. He didn't even go dancing at the club. Dai might of been Kyrie's best friend but he was pretty mysterious. He did like to tease her though.

Laughter rang through the apartment, but it didn't read in her eyes. It never did. "Trust you to use a night out as an excuse to stroke your hard on for social Darwinism." Uh oh. Was that a statement that might pass as an intelligent thought? From Kyrie? Subject change. "Music! I wanna hear The Ketchup sooonnnng!!!" Good cover K. Whine about some stupid, inane song and start dancing around He'll think it was a fleeting moment of clarity and brush it off.. She was already on her feet and at the state of the art stereo. Typical. For Dai anyway. "Come on Dai Dai I know you have it"

Dai groaned and turned to go back into his room.

"I just have classical music you nut." He called over his shoulder heading into the bathroom. Now he wished he had taken the man up on his offer to go back to his house. Of course he didn't just have classical. He also had some music choices he kept hidden from the general public. His most precious music he loved. It was Japanese rock, dark and angsty gothic stuff. But he didn't really want anyone to know about that so he kept it hidden.

Taking off his pants and underwear he stepped into the shower which was almost the whole room. He leaned against the wall and contemplated some things in his mind. Things like what he would do tomorrow and what Kyrie looked like naked. He was a man after all. Men thought about shit like that. Of course most men didn't think about getting fucked by another guy, but Dai wasn't exactly hand-picked perfection.

"Lucky for me I always carry a couple of CDs" A footsteps resounded through the apartment as she moved to her purse, then again as she moved back to the stereo. Strange how even barefoot she sounded like a wild animal. The upbeat yet laid back song with the distinctly Spanish twist blasted through the apartment. And she was dancing again.

This is good. This is safe.

Friday night it's party time
feeling ready looking fine,
viene diego rumbeando,
with the magic in his eyes
checking every girl in sight,
grooving like he does the mambo
he's the man there en la disco,
playing sexy feeling hotter,
he's the king baliar la ritmo ragatanga,
and the dj that he knows well,
on the spot always around twelve,
plays the mix that diego mixes with the salsa,
y la baliar and he dances y la cantar

For a party girl her Spanish wasn't bad. "DAI DAI! COME DANCE WITH ME!"

"I'M IN THE DAMNED SHOWER!!!" Dai took the shampoo off of the ledge and started to clean his long black hair. He rinsed it and turned the water up to very hot and let the water flow over his body. He moaned a little as the water eased his tense muscles. He vowed to go get a massage tomorrow.

Was he actually expecting that to stop Kyrie? Thing about her, she’d christened herself. In alcohol, cigarettes, and sex. She'd been reborn and dubbed herself 'Kyrie'. Kryie Eleeison. Lord have mercy. That didn't mean that she did. Within seconds she was in the bathroom, next to the shower. Sang the lyrics at the top of her lungs, doing a sexy dance against the glass door.

"aserejè ja de jè de jebe tu de jebere seibiunouva,
majavi an de bugui an de buididipi,
aserejè ja de jè de jebe tu de jebere seibiunouva,
majavi an de bugui an de buididipi"


"Oh my god..." Dai burst into laughter. "What the hell are you singing?" He poked his head out from the frosted glass door, his perfectly sculpted body blurred and hidden. "I asked you if you wanted to take a shower with me and you said no. Change your mind?" He smiled slyly.

The girl shrugged and pulled the expensive scrap of fabric masquerading as a dress over her head. She didn't wear a bra. She didn't need one. She didn't wear panties. She couldn’t' be bothered. She stepped into the shower, right into the stream of water. "Asereje. It's about a guy who goes out dancing every Friday night and sings the wrong words to Rapper's Delight." Beads of water moved over her shoulder, down her back, and into the crease of her rear. She shot a smile over her shoulder at Dai. "Though some idiots believe its a satanic chat. Typical. Everyone wants to believe there's some mythic, mystical or just plain super natural force trying to sway their thoughts and decisions. As if a supreme being would be concerned with something so boring."

Dai moved to let her in and he shook his head. "Perhaps some supreme beings get bored and want to try something new?" He smiled and was happy that he imagined her naked perfectly. She was everything he had expected, which was nothing short of perfection.

"Come here, let me wash your hair." He motioned to her with one hand and started to reach for the shampoo bottle with the other.

She paused for a moment "Do I need to tell you that I'll slaughter you if you get it in my eyes?" Even as she said it, she moved closer and let her head fall back a bit. Did she stop to realize that she was naked in the shower with her best friend? No. It didn't matter. "If a supreme begin wanted to try something new and never thought of jumping into an unsuspecting body and deflowering an innocent little virgin, I have no respect for their supremacy. That's Bored Deity 101. The prospect of inflicting pain and shedding blood alone is more than enough enticement. You know...violence and sex are alike that way."

"Well I'm sure in the past that being has had plenty of that, and plenty of virgins. In fact if I were a god I'd want a cocky human that thought she knew what she was doing only to give her the best night of her life." Dai squirted some of the shampoo into his hands and rubbed them together. He then started to massage the shampoo into Kyrie's scalp. He was indeed careful not to get any in her eyes or anywhere else on her face.

"That's just you wanting to show off. If I were a supreme being, I'd break her open." A small sigh of pleasure came from her lips, and her entire demeanor was changing. She still spoke as if it were the most natural thing in the world, claiming that sex with deities was only worth the bloodshed. "When I finished with her she'd be raw. I'd lick the blood away and bathe myself in the rest. There'd be nothing left for my seed to cling to."


Dai laughed. "What has gotten into your little head? Are you mad at something?" He let his fingers trail from her head to her neck and shoulders massaging down. Hmm, she was tense as well. Since he had taken a few massaging lessons he was pretty good with his hands.

Another moan from her pretty mouth. She leaned forward against the wall for leverage. "mm. Harder. I'm not mad at anything. Just saying what I would do in that situation. What's wrong with wanting to break something apart?"

"Nothing. It's simply not what I would do." Dai sighed softly and worked his hands down her back. "You need to go to the spa more. Can't you feel all these knots?"

"I can't go to the spa. I have to work Dai." She pulled away and turned to face him, smiling sweetly. "Not everyone can support themselves by looking fabulous. And it's not exactly easy keeping up with you."

Dai placed a hand on his heart. "Ouch, that hurts." He smiled softly. Of course it didn't hurt him, but he wanted to see how Kyrie'd react. "Do you need me to slow down?" He raised an elegant eyebrow with a crooked smile.

"Fuck you Dai." Kyrie pulled away completely and stepped out of the shower. It was official. She was in serious mode. Damn it. She kept talking as she wrapped a towel around herself. "I can fucking well take care of myself. So spare me the old money guilt crap." Piece: said. Towel: secured. Kyrie: out of the bathroom, changing the music and plopping down unceremoniously on the couch. Wet spots be damned.

Dai smiled after her and her misunderstanding and shut off the water. He thought that she hurried out of the bathroom a little too fast. He took his time in getting dried, grabbing a black silk kimono with a gold and silver dragon on the back. Unlike most bath kimonos' this one was long. He went into the living room and stood behind Kryie, arms crossed.

"My, but you are in a mood today." He sat beside her and crossed his legs man style, making sure not to reveal any unnecessary flesh. "Besides I meant did you want me to slow down something else." He shrugged and leaned against the back of the couch, his hair still dripping wet. Wet spots be damned indeed.

She should have said she was sorry. She should have laughed good-naturedly. After all, they both knew money was a sore spot for her. A bitter, festering spot. Instead she leaned against Dai and closed her eyes, enjoying the far more mellow music playing. "I'm allowed to be serious sometimes, Dai. I mean around you. ...right?"

Dai smiled and combed out her hair with his hands gently. "You can be yourself in front of me Kyrie. I won't judge you."


"It took 21 years to build that mask Dai. It doesn't fall quickly. For anyone. ...As a matter of fact it's never fallen." She snuggled closer to Dai and tapped her foot to the music. Obviously trying to get back into her happy mood. And trying far too hard. "I feel like roller lading by a river. Or walking the ledge of a roof."

"How about you just shut up and let me hold you?" Dai put his arm around her and let her stay against him. He rubbed his thumb against the skin on her shoulder and felt a little more relaxed. The last traces of the club had dropped off of him.

"You know how I am. By the time I've let my guard down it'll be time to go out again. I'll just have to put it back up." She shivered a little as a slow, almost melancholy song came on the radio. Strange, this was supposed to be her company appropriate CD. No unhappy stuff allowed! Shut up. It's only Dai. The girl closed her eyes and turned over so that she was face to skin with Dai's stomach. "How's the building going?'

"You can just spend the night here you lazy girl. And the building is going very well. It's almost done actually. Now I just need to furnish it and things like that. I haven't thought of a name yet, but I think naming it after a flower is a good idea... and it has to be in English." The question made Dai's thoughts stray back to work.

"Hm. Violet? Gardenia?" She barely even noticed that she'd switched to English. "Orchid? Nightshade? It's pretty but poison. Kinda like belladonna. Although I think they made that up for a movie." She snuggled closer to Dai, shaking visibly now. "...cold."

Dai looked down at her and gently scooted from the couch. He wanted to chide her for hurrying out of the shower like that, but instead he simply held his hand out to her. "Come with me my princess, I'll get you warm." He couldn't help but wink at her.

She almost didn't accept the offered hand. Then, something in her, around her eyes, softened just a bit and she reached out and took Dai's hand. "You're avoiding the suggestions Dai Dai." She switched back to Japanese. Bad sigh, her mind and her body weren't sinking up anymore. Tell tale sign of fatigue. Partying all night, every night will do that to you. Worst of all, she didn’t' seem to realize that she'd switched languages twice. "Well?"

Dai pulled her up to him, his hand pressing against the small of her back so they were touching. "I like Orchid." He smiled and led her to his room turning down the sheets. "Please don't expect me to sleep on the couch... or in any other bedroom."

"It's your house Dai. I don't expect you to do anything. Except maybe agree to serve as a good blanket/pillow and let me beg off of talk about work tonight." The towel fell to the floor. Kyrie climbed into the soft bed. "I think I'm tired. I can't tell yet"

Dai had wanted to talk about the club, but she was in one of her rare moods that he loved so he simply nodded. "I'm sorry I'm not as soft or as fluffy as a pillow." He was on the skinny side, but not sickly skinny. He climbed in after her, kimono discarded and immediately reached for her and pulled her close. "I think you are tired." He kissed her forehead softly and closed his eyes, head resting on the pillows.


"Will you wake me up in the morning? ...Work." She moved closer to him, as if the idea of leaving was horrible. Or maybe it was the idea of where she was going. "mmm. It's warm in here. Unless I've become a heat vampire." Dear God. "Sweet Jesus Dai, make me stop talking. You know it's only going to get worse from here. I'll start talking about submarines or scorpions wars or something stupid like that."

Dai chuckled and shook his head. "What time do you have to work?"

"Early. Need to leave at 9. I hate it there." She sighed softly and closed he eyes. The pungent aroma of the club had been replaced by the smell of Dais' expensive soaps and shampoos. It wasn't what she was used to...but it was comforting. "Met me at that restaurant for lunch. You know the one that's decorated like a church. They have beef you can get nearly raw. I want to try it. I've got the urge to eat steamed vegetables dipped in blood and semi raw meat dipped in butter sauce."

Dai simply smiled and nuzzled her cheek. "Mmmmm I'll be up before you. I have to get up at 6am. I'll have Tata wake you up." Tata was unfortunately the name of his alarm clock.

"No. Wake me up when you get up then. I don't want to wake up alone." Her voice was going soft; she was definitely a few seconds away from sleep. 'And the restaurant?"

"Mmm I'll be there." Dai felt himself already drifting off to sleep. "Oyasumi Kyrie..." He kissed her forehead again and let himself drift further into sleep.		  
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Bio/character sheet   
02:20am 18/06/2005
  Character Concept
A party girl with a serious/intelligent bent. Able to defend herself but chooses feigned shallowness and stupidity to a battle of wits or fists.

Appearance
Slim torso, shoulder length brown hair, black eyes, and lots of legs. She has the prefect body to party…until you look into her eyes. You see Kyrie’s eyes don’t mesh with her girlish good looks and ever changing style of dress. Her eyes are almost always cold and hard. Laughter does not reach them. Tears never fall from them. Her jaw is just a bit harder then seems to fit her image. Otherwise its all soft angles and smooth, soft skin.

Background
To all outsiders, Kyrie is the epitome of shallowness. Don’t try to ask her about something deep, you’ll only earn a blank stare and a drink spilled on strategic area just for giggles (if she’s in a good mood) or a dark sneer and a puff of smoke in your eyes (if she’s in a bad mood). Stick to the safer edge of the topic pool and everything’s peachy keen. She’ll dance, drink, sing, joke, be the general life of the party.

Only her best friend Dai knows the truth. That she was a pure bred, old money, silver spoon baby. Given the finest education (fluent in two languages with trace knowledge of many others) all to inherit a fortune and an empire that no longer existed. Only Dai knows the truth of Kyrie. Still waters run deep, and fast pace and jagged rocks are the best ways to keep people away.

Dai is the only one who will ever see her let her guard down. The only person to see the mask of shallow materialism fall away, leaving just the strong, proud, intelligent girl. And even Dai doesn’t get to see it too often. How she earns money to support her lifestyle is a mystery, but it’s common knowledge that it doesn’t involve compromising her pride or surprisingly rigid code of ethics. Though somewhere along the way the has developed an alarming affinity for firearms.

Activities
Her days are a mystery. Either because she keeps them secret or because they don’t exist. It’s widely rumored that she may be on of the few denizens of Tokyo popular and fashionable enough to be paid for her appearances at clubs. Rumors that she of course refused to set straight.

Strengths/Weaknesses
She hides behind too many masks for her own good. Everything about her is just out of reach. No details. No names (come now, you weren’t so foolish as to believe she might actually be named Kyrie…were you?). No numbers. Nothing concrete. She wears her shallowness like a suit of armor, using it to keep at bay all that might pry just a bit deeper than she likes. The mask never falls, but her true self does show through on occasion.

Goals/Motivations
To host the worlds most fabulous bash of course! Oh…you mean the truth? Himitsu.		  
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kyriemercy
 
 

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